What to Do Right After Your Pet Passes (A Simple Checklist for Pet Parents)

Losing a pet can feel unreal. One moment, you’re doing what you’ve done a thousand times—checking on them, talking to them, adjusting a blanket, whispering “I’m right here”—and the next, the world changes. Even when your pet has been sick for a while, even when you thought you were prepared, the moment it happens can still knock the air out of your lungs.

In the middle of grief, it’s hard to think clearly. Your body may feel shaky. Your mind may go blank. You may feel frozen between heartbreak and disbelief. And then, almost immediately, a painful practical question shows up:

What do I do now?

This guide is here to help you through the first hour and first day after your pet passes—with calm, simple steps. Whether your pet passed at home, at a clinic, or unexpectedly, you deserve support and guidance. And if you need compassionate help with aftercare, Resting Rainbow is here to walk beside you during one of the hardest goodbyes you’ll ever face.

Below is a clear, gentle checklist you can follow—one step at a time, at your own pace.

First, Take a Breath (Yes, Really)

Before you do anything else, pause.

Put one hand on your chest. Take a breath in slowly. Let it out even slower. Do it again.

Grief can make you feel like you need to “do something” immediately. But you don’t have to rush. There’s no perfect way to handle this moment. There’s only your way—and whatever you’re capable of right now is enough.

If you’re reading this shortly after your pet passed, here’s something you need to hear:

You are not doing this wrong.

Quick Checklist: What to Do Right After Your Pet Passes

If you want the simplest version first, here it is:

1. Confirm your pet has passed (gently check breathing and responsiveness)
2. Give yourself time with them (talk, cry, sit, hold their paw)
3. Move them to a cool, peaceful space if needed
4. Prepare your pet’s body (blanket, towel, positioning)
5. Decide on aftercare (cremation, burial, clinic arrangements)
6. Call someone you trust (support matters)
7. Contact a pet cremation provider like Resting Rainbow if you need help
8. Take care of yourself (water, food, rest—small things count)

Now, let’s walk through each step in detail so you feel supported and confident.

Step 1: Confirm Your Pet Has Passed (Gently)

This is the part no one wants to do, and it can feel scary. Sometimes pets pass quietly in their sleep, and you may not be sure at first.

Here are gentle ways to check:

• Look for breathing (chest movement, air from the nose)
• Call your pet’s name softly and watch for response
• Touch their side or paw and see if they react
• Check their gums—after passing, gums can become pale or cool
• If you’re unsure, you can contact your veterinarian for guidance

Important note: There can be natural muscle movements after passing (small twitches or sigh-like releases). These are reflexes and can be normal.

If you’re uncertain, it’s okay to call your vet and say:
“I think my pet has passed, but I’m not sure. Can you help me confirm what to look for?”

Step 2: Give Yourself a Few Minutes (or Longer)

You don’t need to rush into logistics the second your pet is gone.

If you’re able, give yourself permission to simply be with them.

You can:

• Sit beside them
• Hold their paw
• Tell them what they meant to you
• Thank them
• Cry
• Take a quiet moment as a family

Some people feel comforted by doing something small and meaningful, like:

• lighting a candle
• placing their favorite toy nearby
• wrapping them in their favorite blanket
• putting on calm music
• saying a prayer

There is no “right” amount of time. Some people need five minutes. Others need an hour. Some people can’t bear to look right away—and that’s okay too.

This moment is sacred, even when it hurts.

Step 3: If Your Pet Passed at Home, Move Them to a Comfortable Spot

If your pet passed on the floor, on the bed, or somewhere that doesn’t feel practical for the next steps, you may want to gently move them.

A few tips to make this easier:

• Use a blanket or towel beneath them to help lift
• If your pet is larger, ask someone to help
• Move slowly and carefully
• Speak softly—many people find it grounding to keep talking to their pet even after they’ve passed

If moving them feels too difficult emotionally, you don’t have to do it alone. You can call a trusted friend or family member, or reach out to a pet aftercare provider for help.

Step 4: Position Your Pet’s Body (A Practical, Kind Step)

This can feel uncomfortable to read, but it’s one of the kindest things you can do—especially if you may need to wait a little before transport or pickup.

Here’s what you can do:

• Lay your pet on their side on a blanket or towel
• If possible, gently place their legs in a natural position
• You can close their eyes if they remain open (not always possible)
• Place a small rolled towel under the head if needed
• Cover them with another soft blanket

This is not about being “clinical.” It’s about giving your pet dignity and giving yourself a more peaceful environment during an overwhelming time.

Step 5: Keep the Room Cool (If You Can)

If your pet passed at home and you’re not able to arrange aftercare immediately, keeping the space cool can help preserve your pet’s body for a little longer.

Helpful steps include:

• Lower the thermostat a few degrees
• Keep them out of direct sunlight
• Use a fan in the room if needed

Some families also place a cold pack near (not directly on) their pet’s body, wrapped in a towel.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, focus on just one thing: move them to a cooler room if possible.

Step 6: Decide What Happens Next (Cremation, Burial, or Vet Arrangements)

In the first moments after loss, decision-making can feel impossible. But you don’t need to figure out every detail instantly.

Here are the most common options:

Option A: Call Your Veterinarian

If your pet passed at home and you have an established vet, they may be able to:

• confirm passing
• guide you on next steps
• help coordinate cremation services
• allow you to bring your pet in for aftercare arrangements

This can be helpful if you want medical confirmation or support.

Option B: Contact a Pet Cremation Provider

Many families prefer a direct provider because it can feel more personal, supportive, and clear. A trusted provider can help guide you through everything—from what to do immediately to what happens next.

This is where Resting Rainbow can help if you’re looking for compassionate care and a gentle process.

Option C: Home Burial (Where Legal/Appropriate)

Some families choose burial at home. If you’re considering this, make sure to check:

• local laws (some areas have restrictions)
• depth and safety
• wildlife protection considerations
• whether your area has high water tables

Many pet parents don’t feel ready to make this decision quickly, and that’s normal. You can choose the option that feels right for your family and circumstances.

Step 7: If You Choose Cremation, Understand the Main Types

Many pet parents hear “cremation” and aren’t sure what it actually means or what choices they have. Here’s a simple breakdown:

Private Cremation

Your pet is cremated individually, and ashes are returned to you.

This option often brings comfort to families who want to keep their pet close or plan a memorial.

Communal Cremation

Pets are cremated together, and ashes are not returned.

Some families choose this option for simplicity or budget reasons, and it can still be done respectfully and lovingly.

If you’re not sure what you want, that’s okay. You can ask questions before committing to anything.

Step 8: Call Someone You Trust (Because You Shouldn’t Carry This Alone)

Grief is heavy. And the hours after a loss can feel especially isolating.

If there is someone safe you can call—do it.

You don’t need the perfect words. You can simply say:

• “My pet just passed and I don’t know what to do.”
• “Can you come sit with me?”
• “Can you help me make a call?”
• “Can you help me move them?”

Even if they can’t fix the pain, they can help you feel less alone.

Step 9: Consider Small Keepsakes (Only If You Want To)

Some families want a keepsake right away. Others can’t bear the thought.

Either response is normal.

If you’d like to create a small memory in the moment, you might consider:

• clipping a small piece of fur
• taking a paw print (ink or clay kit)
• saving their collar or tag
• choosing a favorite photo to set aside
• writing down a quick memory while it’s fresh

Even a simple note in your phone like: “Today you made me feel safe. Thank you.” can become something you treasure later.

Step 10: If Your Pet Passed Unexpectedly, Be Gentle With Yourself

Unexpected loss hits differently. It can come with shock, confusion, guilt, and a painful loop of “what ifs.”

You may find yourself thinking:

• “I should have known.”
• “If only I had done something sooner.”
• “I wasn’t there when they needed me.”
• “This is my fault.”

But here’s the truth:

Loving someone does not give you control over life and loss.
You didn’t fail your pet. You loved them. You gave them a home. You tried.

In sudden loss, your job isn’t to solve the mystery right away. Your job is to survive the moment. Answers can come later if needed.

Step 11: If Your Pet Passed at the Vet Clinic

If your pet passed at the clinic, you may have a different set of next steps.

Often, the clinic will ask:

• Do you want to take your pet home?
• Do you want cremation?
• Do you want ashes returned?
• Do you want any memorial items?

This can be a lot when you’re actively grieving.

Helpful phrases you can use:

• “Can you explain the options slowly?”
• “Can I have a few minutes with them?”
• “Can I take a brochure home?”
• “I need a moment before deciding.”

You’re allowed to ask for time. You’re allowed to cry. You’re allowed to not be “composed.”

Step 12: If You Need to Transport Your Pet (A Gentle Guide)

If you’re bringing your pet to a vet or cremation provider yourself, here are some practical tips:

• Place your pet on a blanket or towel
• Wrap them gently and keep them secure
• Use a box or sturdy container if that feels easier
• Place them in the back of your vehicle where they won’t shift
• Bring someone with you if possible

This can be emotionally intense. If you feel like you can’t do it, it’s okay to ask for help.

Step 13: What Not to Do (Common Mistakes to Avoid)

When you’re grieving, it’s easy to panic and second-guess everything. Here are a few things to avoid if possible:

• Don’t rush into a decision if you’re unsure
• Don’t pressure yourself to be “okay” for others
• Don’t let anyone minimize your grief (“It was just a pet”)
• Don’t skip eating/drinking for too long (your body needs support)
• Don’t feel guilty for needing help

This is hard because it mattered. That’s the whole point.

Step 14: Take Care of Other Pets in the Home

When you have surviving pets, things can get complicated fast. You’re grieving, and they may be confused or anxious.

A few gentle ways to support them:

• stick to their normal feeding schedule as much as possible
• offer extra comfort and calm attention
• keep routines consistent
• watch for changes in appetite or behavior
• give yourself grace if you can’t do “extra” right now

Some animals may search, vocalize, or seem restless. That’s normal too.

You don’t need to be a perfect pet parent today. You just need to keep everyone safe and cared for the best you can.

Step 15: A Simple “First 24 Hours” Plan

If everything feels overwhelming, here’s a realistic plan for the next day:

In the First Hour

✅ Confirm passing
✅ Sit with your pet
✅ Move them to a peaceful space
✅ Take a breath

In the Next Few Hours

✅ Decide whether to call your vet or aftercare provider
✅ Ask someone for support
✅ Drink water
✅ Eat something small (even toast counts)

Before the End of the Day

✅ Arrange aftercare (cremation or burial plan)
✅ Gather a keepsake (optional)
✅ Let yourself rest

You don’t need to “get through it” gracefully. You just need to take the next step.

Step 16: What to Say When People Ask “How Are You?”

This question can feel unbearable right after a loss. You don’t owe anyone a polished answer.

Here are a few responses that are honest but simple:

• “I’m heartbroken, but taking it one step at a time.”
• “I’m not okay, but I’m getting through today.”
• “I don’t really have words yet.”
• “Thank you for asking. It’s been really hard.”

And if someone says something awkward (because many people do), you can just say:
“I appreciate you caring. I’m just really sad.”

Step 17: If You’re Feeling Numb, Empty, or “Not Emotional Yet”

Some people cry immediately. Others feel nothing at first.

Numbness is a normal grief response—your brain protecting you from overload.

You might feel:

• detached
• foggy
• exhausted
• strangely calm
• guilty because you aren’t crying

You don’t need to force anything. Your grief will show up in its own way, in its own time.

Step 18: When to Seek Extra Support

Pet grief is real grief. And sometimes it hits harder than you expected.

Consider extra support if you’re experiencing:

• panic or intense anxiety that won’t settle
• inability to eat or sleep for days
• overwhelming guilt that doesn’t ease
• isolation or feelings of hopelessness
• fear you won’t be able to cope

Support can look like:

• a grief counselor
• pet loss support groups
• a trusted friend who “gets it”
• a therapist
• spiritual support

You deserve care, too.

A Gentle Note About “What If I Wasn’t There?”

Many pet parents carry this pain:
“I wasn’t there when it happened.”

If that’s you, please hear this:

Your pet knew your love.
Your pet knew your voice.
Your pet knew your routine and your heart.

Being present for every second isn’t what made you a good pet parent.

Loving them every day did.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone (Resting Rainbow Can Help)

When you’re in the middle of grief, having someone calm and compassionate guide you can make all the difference.

If you need help with what to do next, Resting Rainbow is here to support you through the aftercare process with kindness, respect, and the understanding that this isn’t “just logistics.” It’s a goodbye to a beloved family member.

You deserve support that feels gentle—not rushed, not cold, and not confusing.

Final Thoughts: The Checklist That Matters Most

There are many steps in this guide, but the most important ones are simple:

✅ You loved your pet.
✅ You did your best.
✅ You don’t have to be strong right now.
✅ You’re allowed to grieve deeply.

The moment after your pet passes can feel impossible. But you will move through it—one breath at a time, one step at a time.

And when you’re ready for help, Resting Rainbow is here to guide you with compassion, dignity, and care—so you don’t have to navigate the hardest part alone.

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